And then there were 12
by Nate Smith

Portland, OR- The pyramids in Egypt, landing on the moon, making Carrot Top a star.   Up until now these were some of the greatest and most unbelievable feats mankind has ever accomplished.   But last week, these amazing accomplishments were asked to move on down the line and make room for a new human achievement of epic proportions.   Last Sunday morning at approximately 3am four men driven to madness by visions of greatness did the unthinkable and scored 12 flags in 10 minutes in the James Bond: Nightfire multiplayer capture the flag game for PS2.

Those who are not familiar with the game may not understand the significance of this victory, nor the level of difficulty of the challenge.   Basically, they played a perfect game scoring the highest score mathematically possible.

The team consisted of Smitty: a jack of all trades with a sweet tooth for the sniper rifle, Andrew Miller: a cunning courier handy with a grappling hook and deadly with a taunt, Blake Schmidt: an artillery artist who loves to splatter red all over a fresh white alpine canvas, and Chris Gibson: a classically trained gamer from Ohio.

On their own each player is a deadly opponent accustomed to his own style combat.   They had faced each other in many brutal battles but had never before joined forces on the battlefield.   The team was first called together upon Smitty's request.   At first it seemed they would never be able to work together.

"I'm not really used to performing in a team environment.   I work alone, and I prefer it that way," said Gibson.

But the 4 players were true gamers who couldn't refuse a challenge, especially one as seemingly impossible as this.

"A friend of ours, Ambi Burek, said we couldn't do it.   Right then and there it was on like Tron," said Andrew Miller.

Working together as a team for the first time the four of them all fell naturally into their niches and as they toyed with different strategies and new techniques each of them fully realized the role they would play on that fateful run for 12.   It quickly became clear that Blake was the most skilled with the sentinel as he displayed his ability to surgically remove a "baddy" from a teammate's backside without harming the teammate.   Andrew quickly became known as the team's best runner and had an almost scientific knowledge of each route you could take.   He patented the "off the right side of the roof" technique that many believe was the key to the team's ultimate victory.   Smitty fell into his role as a cunning thug who could off opponents with either a swift trigger from his sniper rifle or a deadly double tap to the dome from his P2K.   Gibson, known for methodically taking apart video game sequences before decimating them, was the one to discover the team's full potential when he found 25 extra seconds of game time.

At first the going was tough as the team adjusted to the concept of working together.

"Blake kept shooting us 'accidentally' which was pretty annoying.   Usually towards the end of the round we would break down and have a free for all." Said Smitty.

It looked as though the team would never be able to get the record, until they were jolted back into focus by a comment from Ambi.

"See, I told you.   You guys will never make it," said Ambi as he stuffed his face with a salmon dog.

And then it happened.   Blake took to the roof and prepared for the greatest surgical procedure he would ever perform.   Oyl headed for the hills and broke the speed limit along with a few skulls.   Smitty was doling out death like a peanut vendor at a baseball game.   And Gibson actually started complementing his teammates.   It was if all the planets had aligned and the cosmos were ready to acknowledge something great.  

Towards the end of what would later be known as the perfect round, trouble was brewing.   The team had 9 flags.   Gibson was on the enemy roof waiting for flag 10.   Little did he know Phoenix Commando was donning a concerned face under that black mask.   Suddenly, as the 10th flag appeared, Gibson was under fire.   Using moves he undoubtedly learned from the original Mario Bros. games Gibson dodged a barrage of turtle-shell-esque bullets as he grabbed the flag.   Smitty arrived on the scene to draw the Commando's fire while Gibson escaped off the roof in classic Oyl fashion.   Blake sent a sentinel to clear the roof but Smitty called it off as it grazed his head.   With one well-placed shot the Commando was down.   By then Oyl had arrived and was ready to grab flag 11.   As he ran down the hill Smitty picked off two villains to ensure his safety.   Then, as flag 11 was scored and flag 12 appeared, it was up to Smitty to take it home.   Smitty didn't look at the clock but he would later realize that he had exactly 45 seconds to get back.   He would have to run a perfect route.   Oyl instructed him to jump off the front of the roof and take the damage rather than waste time going the safer route.   As Smitty flew down the slopes Blake cleared the front yard and Oyl and Gibson covered his back.   Smitty made it to the roof and stepped on the flag stand as the clock hit 0.

When the smoke had cleared and the dust had settled, the team had 12 enemy flags in their possession.   Each of the runners, Oyl, Smitty, and Gibson had 4 to call their own.   Also, Blake had 59 kills, another Bond record that may never again be touched.